This was the part of the day when I pretend to be absorbed in a book and covertly watch the live entertainment. Mojo babble flew fast and furious, just like their tiny limbs. Time to duck and dodge. Mojo mania rapidly died out to the geeks from "Ed, Edd 'n' Eddie". (Ever come across anyone named Edd?)
"Hey, Double D, watch this!" Two sofa cushions flung to the floor and a belly flop later, it was time for some of the corniest dialogue this side of the Nile. One of them twisted part of his fringe, made it stand awkwardly, snapped his fingers snazzily and claimed, "Check out my ticket to Coooolsville."
No wonder everyone called them geeks. Uncontrollably, I let out a muffled snort. Not cool. Double D and Eddie retreated to their room, or was it Ed and Eddie? As Ed would say, "Whatever."
From behind the closed door, "Aw, give me a jawbreaker, Ed-boy."
"Not on your life, Eddie" There were ominous thumps and sounds of breaking toys and suddenly, out charged the smaller one clutching his jaw, with two fat tears on his cheeks and a mournful pout. Big brother wisely stayed put in his room.
Five minutes on, Zorro in full costume flourished his sword and pranced before us, taunting the injured. The provocation induced its desired result. Zorro, still fencing with pretend enemies, was unceremoniously rammed from the back by a tiny, but determined, Superman in red and blue. A mighty battle ensued and a lamp was tipped over in the melee.
Both Superman and Zorro fled at the very loud intake of breath and fatal glare from the mother of all villains.
Peace reigned for all of two minutes. It was time for the Harry Potter hour. Toy snooker cues were converted into Hogwarts students' wands and Harry and Draco were going full throttle at their duelling contest.
"Expelliarmus!""Ricta sempra!""Serpent sorcia!""Avada Kedavra!""Crucio!""You're dead. Avada Kedavra killed you. You can't say anything after that.""But I said Crucio before your Avada Kedavra.""Did not!""Well then, Protecto!""But you're dead. You can't say Protecto!""Can too!""Mama!"
"Silencio!" Professor McGonagall was in no mood to be generous. "Off with you to your dorms. Finish your homework. And not another word." Menacing stuff.
Harry and Draco dropped their wands reluctantly, but soon Johnny Bravo sidled up and drawled, "Heyyy, sexy Mama, how 'bout some Monopoly first?"
"Firstly, you can't call me that and secondly, the answer is not before you finish your homework."
Johnny's sidekick piped up with, "What does sexy mean?"
"I'll explain after you finish your homework." Did I sound robotic or was it just me?
Johnny and sidekick marched off to their "Chamber of Secrets" and there were reassuring noises of school bags being unzipped and books being slammed on the table.
"Jinkies! The only thing I have to do is reading. Nothing else.""Oh Fred, could you help me with my worksheet?""No way. Uh-uh.""Not even for a Scooby snack?""Rokay! Scoooooby dooby doo!"
And they say too much TV adversely affects children. Now, wherever did they get that idea?
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